My Dad is amazing! Happy Father's Day to you, Daddy!
1. Dad lived in Southern Utah and Las Vegas. He's a desert dweller. ;)
2. Dad is an only boy of an only boy and only had one boy. Now he has many sons-in law.
3. His father was a Biology teacher and had SO MANY animals! Probably why Dad doesn't like animals, but still let us have a doggie, cuz he knows Mom loves dogs. But, even though he doesn't like animals, they love him. Babies do as well.
4. He goes by Bob. He is THE Bob. And don't you forget it ;) Also known as "Grumpa" "Dad" "Bullet Bob" and my personal favorite, coined by River: "Poopa".
5. He served an LDS mission in NEW ZEALAND!! Has some really fun, amazing stories about it, and I would dearly love to take him back.
6. Knows one piece on the piano he can still play. Poor man had to deal with a family of musician, has been to countless numbers of concerts, and still supports us through it all, even when he doesn't particularly enjoy them. I know I've done my job as a musician if my mom cries at my performance, and my dad sleeps.
7. Dad was super talented at football and basketball. He coached a few of Rob's sports teams, and I think really liked it when I ran cross country and track. He came to almost EVERY blastedly boring meet. Seriously, it has to be the most boring sport to watch, but he supported me every time. Sorry I didn't turn out to be a sports person. >.>
8. He is SUCH a supportive Dad. Supports us with everything we do. He drove me to Boise every other week for violin lessons for four years, and chaperoned for field trips when I was little. He also drove up to Rexburg every Halloween to come see our infamous Halloween awesome concerts. And- it was always snowing.
9. Dad is awesome with numbers and an extremely hard worker. He works 12 hour days often and puts in so many extra hours to get everything he needs done. He does five guys' work while he has had health issues pretty much since he was married. He has taught me the value of work, and is THE example of providing for your family- working hard for his loved ones.
10. Dad likes to laugh and is a big tease. He makes me giggle all the time, and we get along well. He's got a really goofy sense of humor, and HAS a sense of humor. He's pretty quick on the draw.
11. Dad has his own language, with words like "hooty patooty", and "can you hand me that rootie?" while all of us ask him what the heck he's talking about. He also likes to change lyrics of songs, which is absolutely entertaining.
12. Dad has a great sense of direction. There were several times where we traveled to somewhere he'd never been and he found everywhere he wanted to be. I inherited NONE of that.
13. Dad may not be a super romantic, but he'll actually watch Jane Austen, and other girly movies with his girls. He doesn't like to make waves, and will let us BE feminine and girly. But how's THIS for romantic: He knew he was to marry Mom, and even though she gave the ring back several times, he had patience, and knew he loved her and they were going to get married.
14. Speaking of that: Dad has stayed worthy to hold the priesthood and knows how to pray and receive answers. I'm so lucky to have a father like that. He can lead our family with inspiration and the Lord's help. He freely gives Father's blessings for ANY reason, and speaks them beautifully. I know that he speaks from the Lord.
15. Dad is spiritual, and patriotic. He has a lot of wisdom, and is very smart. He's pretty chill most of the time, and people feel good around him.
Dad is awesome, and I love him so much! I've had an amazing example of how a father and husband should be. So, I have some high expectations. ;) Happy Daddy's Day!
After a crap day at work, a car dying and needing to buy a new one this week, worrying about money, etc. etc., it was a blessing to have a reminder of what is really important last night. My sister took me out to sushi, which was SO at a needed time! I love having some family close. They really are the best friends and the ones who are there all the time. Sometimes its difficult not having super close friends near you, though partially that's my doing working at the usual social times. But, a girl has to work. Anyway- though I do have some AMAZING friends who live cross country (wish we lived closer). Wow, I'm rambling today! ok, back on topic: I've always wanted to be a mom, and there are moments I have a difficult time coping with the fact I have to keep waiting for something that I consider of most importance. But, I have some sweet moments that keep me going as an aunt. Last night, after having sushi with my sister, I watched my nephew and niece so she could go to a movie with her hubby. They had an early bedtime and headed to bed fairly soon after my sister left. We were having fun playing, and I was actually really sad to send them to bed so early. They both went without a fuss, which is rare. ;) much to their aunt's surprise. My nephew got ready for bed and fell asleep as I was getting my younger niece ready, so I didn't get to give him a hug. But, when I put my niece down, she called me back in, because she just wanted to "talk" in her year-old talking with me while she settled in.(She calls me "Manna" and I love it <3) She was falling asleep so I said goodnight and "I love you." She said "luv too," and my heart just MELTED. I love being an aunt. LOVE it. It was the easiest night babysitting and made my night. It reminded me that all the junk I was stressing out about wasn't important. Family is important.
My mom is my best friend. Literally. She and I are ridiculously alike. She is the most kind-hearted, generous, and loving person. The truest friend anyone could ever know. She is classy and spiritual, and makes the best cookies you'll ever have. She taught me how to care about people and how to always use your talents to enrich other's lives. She is my heroine.
Playing in a pit orchestra currently . . . especially a Roger's and Hammerstein one reminds me of some of my favorite moments of playing with my mom. We always got to be stand partners and would enjoy the bonding of sharing laughs and the joy of music. Usually one of my siblings (most of the time Missy ^^) would be up on stage in the play while we were in the pit. I have a dear love of playing in the pit for musicals and I believe that is part of it: sharing the experience with my mom.
Mom cries at beautiful music, and feels deeply. I'm getting more and more like this, and as annoying as it is to be a cry-baby, we see the world through unique, emotional, artistic eyes. She is extremely creative, artistic, and multi-talented.
She's had to deal with a lot. Raised seven kids, lost her own mother and best friend too many years ago, and still has to deal with health issues. She understands and is empathetic, and deals with the health problems better than I deal with mine . . . by far.
Mom has touched so many lives. Not only her seven children and her husband's, but thousands of students, friends, and countless animals. I love you, Mom. I am so blessed to be your daughter. Thank you for your lessons, love, and friendship.
I LOVE playing in a pit orchestra for musicals! LOVE it! I get to be apart of the production, I usually love the music, its hard enough in places but not super hard, and I meet such fun people! I used to play in pit orchestras with my mom and we would be stand partners. My siblings would usually be involved in either acting or playing in the pit as well. Musicals just make me so happy and bring back some of the best memories I've had with my mother. Even if the musical is dumb, its still so fun to be involved. They take you back to happy times, where music is used to express something words can't alone.
Speaking of my mother, I got to go home for a bit this weekend, which is always great. ^^ We discussed a bit how gender is so skewed now. She and I love watching Jane Austen, or the old Disney movies together, and we realized part of why we love them so much is the fact men are MEN and women act like WOMEN. Its so . . . confusing and frustrating seeing in the media the blurring of the lines. Why do you think kids now are so confused? We are different and we have different roles. Its nice to see a woman that can be feminine. And feminine does NOT mean weak. She can still be strong and stick up for herself while still acting like a GIRL! Like Fanny Price. She's fairly weak physically but morally and mentally, she isn't. And she's feminine: gentle, caring, and tries to be graceful. Its sad how chivalry and gender has blurred so much.
Love my mom and my family. We're far from perfect, but I feel such support from my parents. Even when I don't feel I've lived up to "expectations," they never have made me feel like that. Home was great. I've also caught another restless travel bug . . . and no money. Doh! Taxes! Arg!
I hate it when I look back and see how much time has passed . . . and how little I'd accomplished since New Year's Resolutions. >_< Heh. Well . . . plenty of year left.
Spring Break was wonderful and came at a perfect time. I spent the break with family and loved it. I love going to my brother and sister in law's home. They have a home filled with the Spirit (even with five very active, very cute kids around :) ) and Wendy is one amazing woman. She has been a wonderful addition to our family and I love her so much. She is a true friend, completely charitable, very talented, and beautiful in and out. My brother is lucky, and they are a sweet, cute couple.
I enjoyed going to the Living Planet Aquarium, enjoying it with my nieces and nephews and quoting Finding Nemo to the fish. Otters are my favorite animals other than dogs and I was disappointed they were just sleeping and not playing. But, they were still so cute. The penguins were SO fun to watch. (I thought of you Sierra. ;) ) I think I'm my little niece Jordanne's favorite. Heehee! Love being an aunt, especially the favorite aunt! ;)
The perfect ending to Spring Break was General Conference. General Conference weekend is my favorite weekend and it always goes by so fast. Every conference has the messages that I need to hear, messages that comfort and uplift, yet at the same time make me want to be a much more spiritual and courageous person. It always helps me remember what is truly important in life. Spring break helped that too this year. I find it sad the so many people care more about who wins American Idol than what is happening in our country or to the people around them.
Another realization hit me, although, I believe it has slowly been surfacing: even though I'm not "successful" in the world's sense (making a ton of money, ambitious, prestigious job) I think its where I need to be. It has been really hard having to slow down. Throughout undergrad I was go go go. I did twelve hour days and was fine with it. Little sleep, not caring much about meals, practicing, ambitious . . . which may be part of why I now have a few health problems . . . I have had to slow down due to Fibromyalgia and a fairly recent diagnosis of PCOS. It is so frustrating . . . especially the "fibro fog" in the brain. (To me it feels like a fibro metal door . . nothing gets in or out) I'm used to feeling on top of things and having a lot of anxiety to drive me to be more ambitious. But I'm not. I'm happy being a violin teacher. Happy to have time to visit family when I can. Happy to have the little bit of time to focus on my health and doing things other than music. The change of diet, making sure to exercise regularly, and having to rest more is a good thing, yet difficult. Sometimes I just want to scream, "I want my life back!" But . . . then I realize I have a different life now for a purpose. I don't type this to have anyone feel bad for me or think that I'm making excuses for anything . . . I just type it because its made me change a lot of things. This stuff . . . along with a few other things . . . have helped in making the past few years difficult (like a really large drop in trust of people in general) but we all have to go through trials.
I've had anxiety and depression for a long time as well. I believe its all very intertwined. But, its just an illness. Problems with firing in the brain. Having to change habits in the way of thinking. Its hard, but I can do it. And if I can, anyone can. I believe in the help of the Lord through everything. It won't be easy, and it requires strength. I recent saw an episode of Breakout Kings on Netflix where one of the characters has debilitating anxiety and depression. She said something that really struck me and I agree with. She didn't want to live in her own prison anymore. And she told another character, "Don't mistake my illness for weakness." I echo the statement, and say the same to anyone going through that as well.
I'm still busy with students, miss playing my violin as much as I used to, but there is a time and season for everything. I decided to try out this whole online dating thing. Let me tell you: this dating scene sucks nowdays. Online or off. I came across the BIGGEST jerk online who the second he found out I was conservative started purposely trying to tick me off and called me horrible names. Even after I had been kind and tried to give him the benefit of the doubt. I have talked to some good guys, but no sparks or anything special so far. Also, swallowed my pride and I'm taking a dating and relationships class in my ward. Should be called debating and relationships. Mostly the guys complain about girls they ask out, saying even within the ward, saying they've basically asked everyone out and we as women complain we don't get asked out. Thanks, dudes. I appreciate not being considered as part of everyone in the ward. I can legitimately say I HAVEN'T been asked out. Ah hypocrisy. Nothing annoys me more. But . . . on we go. Its eternity. I'm not settling for someone who's afraid to ask me out or doesn't think I'm worth trying for again if I am actually legitimately busy working that evening. Did I mention dating sucks?
Righto. 'Nuff ranting. Still working at that chapter. ^^; Braindeadness has been nonstop lately. So frustrating. So much I'd like to do and when I have the time sometimes I don't have the energy. But, I will not give up on what is right, what is good, and what I'd like to do. Whew! Long one. Til next time.
I'm seriously the pied piper for cats. Cats have claimed me as their owner without me feeding them, petting them, or having seen them before. This has happened with at least three different cats. They'll pop into my apartment all sneaky, I'll turn around, and tah dah: there's a kitty in my apartment. I'm always tempted to keep them, but I know they belong to someone else. Currently, there's a cute little black cat with white paws that has claimed me as its owner and my apartment as its. It runs up to me every time I stop to unlock the door. I have to pick it up and put it down, and since I usually have an armful, it slips in and I have to pick it up and take it out. Cute, but . . . . its not my kitty. heehee.
I think animals know I like them. I end up watching dogs regularly and love it. Wish I could have a dog of my own. One of my students' sweet dogs had to be put down recently. I watched her just the week before and she was having problems. I was just grateful my prayers were answered and she didn't die while I was there. I don't think I could have handled it emotionally.
Now to the teeth. I had to get a filling replaced . . . again! Within the course of a year I've had at least three fillings replaced. Love my teeth. Blah.
In other news: I have the best students. Ever. They are so sweet. One of my little ones was too scared to play for the recital we held just a couple days ago. He's only . . . four I believe. But, one of my girls said she'd play twinkle with him and he played with her, watching her intensely. It was THE cutest thing ever. She's now his hero, and mine. What a sweetheart! My heart completely melted and I told myself THAT is why I teach, and teach as I do: with lots of love, positive thinking, and deep love of music.
*sigh* So many things I want to do. Another chapter is coming . . . I've had a pretty dead brain from a busy music month, a little discouragement, and a lot of tired fibro days. But- soon.
This is a very late New Year's post. We have an opportunity in front of us, as we do every year, every week, and every day to become better. When we as individuals become better people, then we can become better families, communities, and country. This is what I believe: I believe there is right and wrong, there is TRUTH, and I hold THESE truths to be self-evident:
We need less "popularity"and more humility.
We need less fans and more true friends
We need less outside "stuff" and more inside riches.
We need to cling more to family and God than what the media thinks.
We need more scriptures, less "popular" books.
More prayer and listening, less shooting off at the mouth.
More sincerity, less fake.
More true and complete happiness and peace, less counterfeit happiness from worshiping worldliness.
More caring, less selfishness.
More going back to traditions and things inspired by God (like the Constitution) and less inspiration from man,
More decent role models, less looking to famous people as our "gods".
More finding yourself through God and less through a boyfriend/girlfriend or so-called friends.
More self-sufficiency, less handouts. True service is a hand up, not hand out.
We don't need the government to tell us to do service. That's OUR job. Theirs is to provide safety and keep from chaos. Not control our lives.
I've learned a lot this past year. Its been a very very tough year and I'm still trying to battle health issues, car issues, and self esteem issues, but I have learned so much more about myself through these trials. I'll tell you right now, I'm not afraid to tell you you're wrong, or mean, or look for the truth. I still have a hard time trusting without praying or researching for myself, which I think is good especially where the media is concerned.
I'm not afraid to say we need to stop this Occupy Wall Street nonsense. It is full on evil. With people chanting "Kill the cops" and speakers encouraging kids to "kill their parents" (with a boy actually doing it) this is not divinely inspired. It is wrong.
Our president says he "deserves a second term". The only thing he deserves is a giant dose of humility and swift kick in the shins. I've heard the ridiculous word "deserves" way way way too much. We need to earn. NOone deserves.
I'm far from perfect, but I do know there are truths. I have things to work on and I"m striving to do just that this year. I'm going to "de-junk" my life. I don't have tv, and I don't miss it. The only time I see it is when I work out at the gym, and I'm disgusted by what is out there. We need a return to good, and the best, not the mediocre and what the media says is amazing.
I know some extremely strong and amazing people. You are lights in my life and wonderful examples. I strive to be like you and I think the world needs to look to YOU as the true role models.
OK, rant Monday done. We are meant to have joy, and I intend to find it in the right places. More writing and art soon. I don't do these things to show off . . I'm not sure its show off worthy anyway . . but because I've rediscovered I love them. I want to spend my "free" time doing things I love and that develop myself as more of what I am and want to be.
